Then there is Neil. DJing is in his blood and when we were younger, he used to take me along to kids’ parties and we would do all the dance moves. I’m a naturally shy person, but Neil pushed me to get out of my comfort zone – I don’t think he knows how much that helped me as a person (thanks mate!).

The early 90s proved to be a difficult time, as my family broke apart when my mum and dad split up. But my best friends were there for me. Neil even lent me his equipment so I could practise my DJ skills.

One particular mix of mine that we still laugh about is my mash-up of Will Smith’s ‘Boom Shake The Room’ with ABBA’s ‘Gimme Gimme Gimme’. Safe to say I have not done that since.

DJing then fizzled out for a while when I discovered the joys of alcohol and a new love of clubbing on Thursday, Friday and Saturday nights in Brighton.

I honestly cannot dance, but that didn’t stop me – picture Mr Bean’s moves but with strobe lighting! But that all changed when I had my eldest son at the age of 22. He is such an amazing boy, and that was such an emotional time – he was my world.

Fast forward a few years and my partner’s sister was having a party for her son’s 18th, but didn’t want to pay for a DJ. You guessed it: she knew I was one of those people who loved music. I could always hire lights and a sound system, surely? It was by no means a great example of DJing, yet I managed to secure another booking that night. That was it; I was hooked.

I started to take even more bookings, so I purchased a little Soundlab mixer, a Skytec amplifier and some data moons from eBay. I hired speakers until I could afford my own. As time went on, I kept putting money back into my business, even though I was going out for very little money whilst I focussed on learning the ropes and building my confidence (I was terrified of using a microphone).

I was enjoying DJing and going out with other DJs and soon got picked up by a local DJ company to help out. I had regular contact with the owner, Mark Gander, who is now a close friend. He used to be a club DJ and took the time to teach me to mix, adding to my arsenal of skills. I was also getting better equipment. I still hated using the microphone though – so much so that I had to write down what I wanted to say.

I later spoke to other DJs, who told me that when they started out they did the same thing. I forced myself onto the microphone more and more, and now I‘m a confident speaker.
Back to my personal life for a moment. I later split with my son’s mum and, after a while, I went on a dating site and sent a message to a lovely woman called Amy. She initially replied and I duly sent her my email to carry on our conversation, though she never got back to me (don’t let her tell you different!). We eventually re-connected and married, and I now have five children including my first-born son.

In 2016, Amy and I endured what was a very dark time. That September we were expecting to welcome our second child (we already had our fantastic daughter Sophia, who is now nine and a brilliant ballet dancer – I’m not sure where she gets her dancing skills, but definitely not from me).

We arrived at the hospital as my wife was in labour with our son. At midnight, the nurse stepped out of the room to get a doctor – initially we thought she might just be tired. We were then moved to another bed and two doctors were now in attendance.

Looking at the scan, I saw nothing.

Amy was in bits. I wanted to crumble too, but she needed me and still had to give birth. Somehow, she did it. I listened out for a cry, thinking and hoping they had got it wrong. But there was nothing. Our beautiful boy was still and silent; the most innocent angel.

I blamed myself and wondered what I’d done wrong. I went into autopilot and did what I could to help ease the pain for Amy. I had all my friends around me: Neil, Chris Rhodes and Matt Parkinson – these guys were amazing. For music at the funeral I spoke to another friend, Brett Stevens, who is a brilliant producer.
We both produced a song and got a lovely girl in America to sing the lyrics. This was my way to express myself and I can never thank Brett enough for his help.

After my son’s passing, I decided I should get on a proper career path and started out as a trainee financial adviser (I had worked in finance since 2008). I enjoyed learning about investments and embarked on the route of administrator as a financial adviser. Then, after a decent few years running my DJ business alongside my full-time work, the dreaded pandemic struck.

I was one of the many people on furlough and I was later made redundant. I got a van and started courier driving – anything to put food on the table, but this also gave me the time I needed to think properly about taking my DJing to the next level. I ended up spending significant money on new equipment and honing my skills. I even spent Thursday evenings DJing outside my house for our neighbours, so that we all had contact.

When the lockdowns finally finished, a DJ agent contacted me and offered to help put me out every weekend. It was just what I needed to find my way into the world of weddings. As time went on, I contacted a DJ I’m sure many of you know – Brian Mole. Brian helped me to work on my business and even suggested I apply for a wedding award. Low and behold, I entered the Wedding Industry Awards and won Wedding DJ of the Year for my region. I honestly was not expecting to win, but wow, what a result!

I take great care over my business and whilst I have looked at bringing other DJs on board, I found it difficult not to panic about others doing work in my name. I know that makes me sound snooty, but it’s something I need to work on. The current way I work is best for me and I have trusted DJs like Neil and Brian who I can send booking enquiries to if I’m already busy. I feel we all work to a similar standard whilst offering something slightly different.

I have many stories from DJing. The one that really comes to mind is when I met one of my couples to discuss their day. The bride was from America and the groom was from the UK. I asked lots of questions so I could establish how they saw their wedding playing out and it all went well. The big day arrived. I turned up to the venue an hour before, as always, and I got ready to play background music whilst they ate. Then one of the groomsmen asked if I would be introducing the wedding party. I hadn’t been asked, but then the bride came over and said it would mean a lot, so I promised I would.

A few minutes later, the groom came over and asked if in addition to announcing them in, I could play some music for them to dance to. I hadn’t done this before and had to think on my feet, so I played Black Eyed Peas – ‘I Gotta Feeling’.
All the wedding party were so thankful. But I was also thankful to them, as I’d never done that before (I soon realised this was the norm in America, where the bride’s family and friends were from). So, I learnt new questions to ask at meetings and a whole different way of running a night.

In fact, later that night provided another eye-opener. I was playing ‘Time Of My Life’ and two guys went for it. One started to tilt backwards and then hit the floor. People started to gather at the scene of the incident. My first thought was to call an ambulance. But he then emerged from the crowd doing the worm! I have never seen anything like it before and haven’t since.

Despite my successes, I don’t pretend to know even a fraction of all that I could and I constantly want to learn. Along the way, I’ve shadowed several DJs in order to learn new techniques, as our industry is ever-evolving. I even joined a comedy course to learn improvisation and push myself even further outside my comfort zone. By the end of the six-week course, I had to perform five minutes of stand up. I’ve never felt so sick, but afterwards I knew it was a big achievement. Not only that, but I’d gained new skills and new friends.

I’ve also attended Pro Mobile Conference. I went by myself, but everyone made me feel so welcome and I gained loads of invaluable information. If you are debating whether to sign up, I say go for it. There are so many ideas and tips I came back with and I even gained new friends.

All my life I have lived by a rule to help others, be polite, and trust that kindness will be returned (I guess you’d call it karma). This is how I’ve made friends and become a recommended DJ at several wedding venues. I love seeing couples having a great time
and I’m always looking to make their day better by finding new ways of working. I believe that thinking outside the box is important, not just so that what I do is different from other DJs but so that I help couples have the best day possible.

In order to build my DJ business, I’ve had to draw on all my skills. This includes my experience in finance, which has helped me decide where I can focus money for advertising and give myself targets so I can follow my dream of DJing full time. As this could be very difficult with such a young family, I decided to start another business that outsources my finance work in order to free up time. I’m also training Amy on the finance side, as she’s keen to learn. This will change everything, as I can do finance work part-time and DJ full-time, and I’ll have money to fall back on in quieter periods.

And now I have ambition to go even further. Maybe one day own my own venue. But before that I want to break into other DJ areas such as corporate events.

It’s fair to say I would not be where I am today without the help of other people. I’m still on my exciting DJing journey and I want to thank everyone who has helped me get to this point. Amy has always been so supportive of my DJing and helps me in all areas – even when choosing equipment. She is my rock.

If there’s anything I’ve learnt in my time as a DJ, it’s that reaching out to other DJs is so important. Most just want to help you grow and spending time with them is a brilliant investment in time. Bouncing ideas off someone doing the same job is invaluable; you’ll learn new ways of working and discover different music to add to your sets. Remember that we all start somewhere and there is plenty of work out there for all of us.